I like to think that I’m in charge around here. In my mind I tell the children what to do and they fall in line. It’s simple because I’m the mom and I make the rules. I realize that is nowhere near reality. But it’s my fantasy world, don’t ruin it for me.
Today was one of those days when the twinkies acted like caged animals. I will never understand why they insist on running around the house like banshees instead of playing outside. We bought a house with a really big back yard for them. Today was the perfect day to be in it.
Instead, they were climbing on the living room furniture. Running their matchbox cars around the kitchen. Playing in the bathroom sink. Or being loud and irritating in any space where I was trying to hide.
In order to avoid shooting whiskey at one in the afternoon I loaded them on their little bikes, leashed up the stupid dog, and took them to the neighborhood elementary school playground. John even came along so he could play basketball.
Have you ever gone to a park, looked around and though, “hmmm…interesting crowd today?”
Yeah, I had that thought immediately.
John was approached by a young man interested in playing basketball. I think they were playing HORSE. The guy kept chatting John up about basketball players and ridiculous techniques. I found it odd that an adult was having that conversation with a kid. John’s tall, maybe he assumed he was older. The other guy was much older, probably mid-twenties. He had his child there (who he was paying zero attention to, but who am I to judge). He seemed a little shady.
Like a good mom, I kept an eye out.
I was also watching the twinkies. Reese rode his bike all over the courts while Jackson played on the equipment. So I was standing in the middle of it all watching my three boys. I only lasted about 45 minutes. Too many people for me to handle.
On the way home John told me the guy he was playing basketball with was a little weird.
Apparently he said, “That white lady keeps looking at us. I think she was a cop.”
John said, “Dude, that’s my mom.”
So it’s settled. I’m in charge. Now all I need is a badge.