We are not food snobs. I like to cook, but I don’t know how to do anything fancy. On occasion we try fine dining, using skills we learned on Top Chef. We eat plenty of junk. The twinkies ask for “Hamburger King” or “Old McDonald’s” almost every day.
I only give in when I am really tired. Or it’s raining. Or snowing. Or hot.
I do have some standards when it comes to food. We will not eat any sort of turkey bacon. Grody. We drink skim milk. We almost never have cereal with marshmallows in it. I try not to eat anything that makes my mouth funny colors. It grosses me out when the kids do it, but I let it slide.
Also, I no longer eat Taco Bell or KFC. I used to eat Taco Bell. Chilitos and meximelts, specifically. There is a special place in me heart for coleslaw and biscuits from KFC, but I don’t eat it anymore.
Taco Bell makes me sick, like cha-cha-cha sick. So that’s a no-go. KFC is just weird. I don’t believe it’s real chicken. It has a gross texture. I don’t know what it is, but it makes me nervous.
Lately the twinkies have started to ask why we never go to “the place with the bell” and “the white face guy restaurant.”
(I agree, referring to KFC as a restaurant is odd.)
As any good parent would, I answered their questions in a clear and concise manner. I told them, “Those places are yucky. If you eat there you get sick.”
Pre-schoolers believe every word you say. EVERY WORD. That comes in handy when you tell them not to run up to stray dogs because they might not be nice. Other times it comes back to bite you in the behind.
I told the twinkies about Taco Bell and KFC earlier this week. One of the roads we take to go just about everywhere has both of those establishments on it. So we drive by 17 times a day.
That means about 10 times each day I hear them yell out…
“Eww, the bell place is gross!”
“Mommy!! That guy is going into the white face guy restaurant! He is going to get sick!!”
One night, they are going to be out with their high school friends after a football game and a street party. They are going to get hungry and go to one of those places. When they bite into their first gordita or fried chicken leg they will hate me.
Hopefully by then they will have stopped using the phrase “white faced guy restaurant.”